What’s Wrong With Me?

Has there ever been a guy in your life who made you ask this question?  Or maybe it was a girl friend.  As soon as you started hanging out with this person, you started hating the way God made you.  You began to wish you were prettier, thinner, more athletic, more girly…just plain different.  The funny thing is, none of the things you started to dislike about yourself were things that God dislikes.  They didn’t have to do with your heart, your faith, your focus on Him.  They had to do with your looks, your personality, your abilities…the very things that God loves and cherishes in you, because He designed them.

Sometimes we have an obsession to be loved, and an obsession to please.  We want to be valued and liked and needed, because we find our worth in relationships with others.  Sometimes this becomes so important to us, that we change ourselves completely in order to fit someone else’s definition of beautiful or worthy.  We can even find ourselves willing to exchange the essense of who we are, and all we stand for and believe in, for the approval of others.

Do you struggle with wanting to please people?  Does your desire to be liked and accepted usurp your passion to honor God?  If so, you are not alone.  But it’s important to realize that just because this is a common struggle, doesn’t make it OK.

If a guy or girl you know makes you feel inferior because of what you look like or enjoy, or what you believe in, that is not a person worth pleasing.  In fact, they’re probably not someone you should want be spending time with!  No true friend will make you feel this way, because a friend looks at the heart and encourages and builds you up, rather than looking at externals and tearing you down.  A true friend doesn’t make you ask, “What’s wrong with me?”  Someone who makes you want to change, to look better, to act differently in order to be accepted and liked, is not worth your time or your trust.

Jesus Christ is the only One truly worth living for, and He loves you just as you are.  He is willing to transform you from the inside out to reflect His holiness and purity, but you can never do or say or be anything that will diminish His love.  He does not judge you because of what you look like.  And when you come to Him with all you are, all your hopes and dreams, everything that matters to you, He is completely trustworthy.  He will never leave your or forsake you, and His love is eternal and perfect.

Dear sister, nothing is “wrong” with the way God made you.  This is not to say that you are perfect or sinless, because you aren’t.  None of us are.  We are all fallen and all of us desperately need the transforming work of our Savior.  And He is faithful to complete that good work in us, making us into the shining reflection of spotless beauty we were always meant to be.

Rejoice in this!  Rejoice in being the girl that God made you to be.  Live life in His service and for His glory and do not be ashamed of your walk with your Lord or the person that He designed you to be.  And don’t let anyone take your eyes off of Him.  Spend your time with people who love you as God made you, and encourage you to walk ever more closely with Him.


3 Responses

  1. How true! Great post! Thanks!

  2. Thank you for writing this! I have always maintained that “self-esteem” is kind of pointless. What does it matter how I esteem myself?…What really matters is what God thinks. As far as my own thoughts go, all that matters is whether I choose to agree or disagree with Him.

    “I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me.” 1 Corinthians 4:3-4

    So it is not the esteem of others that counts. It is not SELF-esteem that counts, either. It is God’s esteem — and that depends on whether or not He sees you through the lens of Jesus Christ.

    It’s dumb (and sinful, incidentally) when we approach brothers or sisters in Christ with the mindset, “How does this person measure up to my expectations?”. What we should be saying is, “This person has been redeemed by God. Let my eyes be opened to see and understand His Light in her!”

  3. That’s very true, Jake; thanks for your insights. (:

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